Rising Ape Collective are busy preparing our next live action choose-your-own-adventure show.
During rehearsal last week we found a befuddled scientist wandering around backstage and demanded he explain himself.
Oi. Who are you and where have you come from?
Hi, I’m Tom the Scientist. No last name I’m afraid. I’m a pretty one dimensional character right now but I really feel like I’ve got a lot of potential.
As far as I can tell, I was grown in a big fish tank by Rising Ape Labs. I emerged last year, fully formed and ready for science and have been sciencing away in their Publish or Perish show ever since.

You seem a bit unsure of yourself. Why is that?
The problem is that my history, character and actual behaviour are all decided for me each night by this weird group of people called an ‘audience’ so it’s hard to know anything for certain in my life.
Well can you at least tell us why the show is called Publish or Perish?
As you probably know, publishing research papers is a really big deal and I’ve got a big deadline for a very important paper coming up. I should make it as long as I’m not distracted by any bizzare characters or side quests.
The ‘perish’ part is quite worrying, personally. There are rumours around the uni that a shadowy yet powerful cabal exact painful punishments on those who fail their departments. But as long as the audience make the right choices for me, I’m sure I’ll be fine. I hope so anyway.
How does it feel to have your destiny completely out of your hands each night?
It’s actually pretty exciting. Last week I had to go to the Moon to research the best way to put tiny hats on spiders. I guess it must have made sense at the time.
Wild stuff. Any advice for audience members aspiring to be a researcher?
The best way to put a tiny hat on a spider is to open a tiny hat shop. They just come in and try them on themselves!
Thanks, Tom. We can’t wait to decide your fate!
Rising Ape Collective perform Publish or Perish on Saturday 22 February at The Room Above, Bristol, as part of a comedy double bill with improvisers The Free Radicals. Book your tickets now